We all have different ways of reacting to the magic figure 40. Clearly GK was celebrating the fact that he has touched this landmark and chose to share his joy with his entire world (probably the best way to deal with it).
Some we know are in denial. They are perennially 3 years away from their 40th.
Some others start the backward spiral just before touching 40. Their clothes and behaviour get progressively younger, a la Shah Rukh Khan in ridiculously tight t shirts mouthing ‘yo’ and ‘cool’ in his avatar as a college student in a Karan Johar flick.
And then there are those who are seen strictly in the company older, fatter and balder people, so that they themselves look younger in comparison.
To each his own.
But you sure know you are past your prime when:
1. You celebrate your birthday at home with a movie, chilled milk(trust me, it is great for acidity) and bottle of pills for company
2. Your annual health check-ups are no longer just annual. Between you and your friends, you have most of the documented ailments in the medical world
3. Your receive compliments such as ‘you don’t look a day over 42’ or ‘this is how I would like to look 10 years from now’
4. If you are woman, your husband has stopped gifting diamonds and pearls. This time it is ‘La Prairie intensive night repair cream’ that promises to defy the ageing process and restore lost confidence. When did I lose it for it to be restored?
5. You have difficult choices to make before your next birthday - its between botox shots, blepharoplasty (trust me, it is a real word – it helps remove eye bags), brow lift and face lift.
6. You child is talking about crushes and heartbreaks with you, no longer about tooth-fairies and Santa. Where was I when she grew up. Probably too busy trying to fight ageing.
7. You are considered experienced and worldly wise by your cousin who has two children of his own? What! How much younger does he think he is? has he forgotten we sat on the same mango tree and threw rotten mangoes at our grandmother’s balding neighbour not too many years ago
8. You find discotheques noisy and cannot identify even a single song.
9. If you do (manage to identify a song), then it must be retro night – when they play music that you till that minute thought was current and trendy.
10. You are in Goa on new year’s eve and haven’t been to a single beach party. You are having champagne and caviar instead with a few close friends at the exclusive private dining area of a 5star hotel.
11. While sipping champagne all you can talk about is the parties and wild binges from your past.
12. You have started reading self help and inspirational books and recommending them to friends too
13. You see your friend’s grown up kid and say precisely the kind of things that made you cringe as a child: ‘Oh dear! Children grow up so fast!’ Or ‘ Do you remember me? the last time I saw you u were this small and crawling all over my carpet ’
And the kid thinks ‘Yeah! The last time I saw you still had some hair left and you were not popping out of your clothes like this’
As for me, I still have some time before I hit this landmark (really!) . And my recommendation to those of you who are close is to stop thinking and go after all those things you wanted by the time you turned 40, with a vengeance. So,
- Go get that big car you can’t bear to see in your neighbour’s garage
- Go for that expensive hair weaving treatment that you so badly want (and need!)
- Join that salsa class before your joints stop cooperating
- Get that painful tattoo (well...if that’s what you really want!)
- Trek up to the Himalayas (ok, got a bit carried away with this one...its best to keep the list objective and manageable; Those BIG HAIRY AUDACIOUS GOALS, taught in management school are for companies , not people pushing 40s)
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